I have been cookied. The internet knows I have been turning around the idea of writing a blog. Over the last few weeks my facebook has been filled with “So you want to start a bog?!” ads. This personal project felt ready for action. However, I knew those guides from other bloggers, while packed with good information, would be a rabbit hole for me. That I could spend an ungodly amount of time in analysis paralysis.
Instead I am starting here armed with the logic of “If I want to start a blog, I should start with writing.” With no higher education in writing, understanding of grammar beyond a basic level that has qualified me as functioning to this point, or certification beyond having been alive for 25 years, I am giving this a shot. I am committing to putting pen to paper and tapping keys to explore what there is to be gained from writing down what is buzzing around inside.
I love a list, a schedule, a 30 day challenge, perfectly filled in boxes tracking goals. This used to mean making plans to start on Monday, or the first of the month, one of those clean places to start. But I am starting this project on 8/13/20 which is a Thursday because Monday’s aren’t actually any better for starting things. I still am constantly fighting the desire to be consistent and create only a cohesive image. The desire to have and therefore live like a drool worthy instagram profile where content is curated and cohesive. That is not a chapter I am in right now, and I don’t know if it is a place I want to be in the future. Right now, as an unemployed 20 something burning with the desire for more than the expected, I am exploring. I am pushing myself to create and put out content that doesn’t feel cohesive because that’s necessary for this stage, and maybe always will be. Maybe I will always be changing my medium, my style, the feel of my work. Maybe I will find a place I want to stay for a while or maybe I will shed my skin over and over not because the last one felt wrong but because the next one feels more right. I don’t know what that will look like from a business standpoint, but it feels worth figuring out to stay true to my creative desire.
So on this rainy Thursday, without a detailed content map, target audience or quantitative measure of success, I am starting to write. I am writing about my journey of self development as a whole and an assortment of projects and undertakings that are teaching me. I am learning about myself, those around me and how I relate to things big and small.
Today was spent in an oversized t-shirt perched in front of my computer making all the digital things happen. Tomorrow however, I will be back outside, hiking lots and then sitting still to recenter myself. I am so looking forward to sitting back on that summit looking out at all that waits to be explored.